The Bitter Bus Has Arrived

I met my friend, P, at a previous job that sucked! It was the worst place that I ever worked and she wasn't a fan either. The good thing was that we shared an office. When one of us was having a bad day or was frustrated and we would start complaining we would joke around and say that we were getting on the "Bitter Bus". Somehow this phrase stuck and I now use it in all situations in life.

I called DH this morning and was irritated about an email that I had received from an acquaintance. Then I complained to him about another situation that happened with a friend this morning. Then I expressed my frustration over one of his employees. He lightly started laughing at me because I was just so frazzled and frustrated this morning. My response, "OK, so just to warn you: the Bitter Bus has arrived. It is driving through town this week and most likely won't leave for a couple of weeks." We both started laughing and he responded, "I see that it's here. Thanks for the warning!".

You see, since November I have not been on any IVF meds. Now, my meds are starting to kick in and make me just a wee-bit hormonal, ie, easily irritable, easily frustrated, easily upset...you get the point. I know this...and yet I can't stop it. These things don't usually bother me to the point that I would even tell him about them because they are so silly. But being on these meds just seem to intesify everything.

So, if I seem a little snappy or irritable in the next couple weeks- I am. I have at least 19 eggs cooking in the oven and I am starting to get bloated already, and it is only day 4 of stims. The vi.agra makes me feel like I am peeing my pants all day long and the doxy.cycline and fl.agyl are upsetting my stomach. And my stim shots are burning my belly.

But I am happy- even though it doesn't sound like it. How could I not be, really? I am getting ready to create new life again and make little embryos that will hopefully become my children. I can't imagine a better time to create these new little lives than in the Spring, where the world blossoms and grows. And as I watch nature change all around me, I hope that I am also watching my belly grow and blossom- for the next nine months.